Universal Bureau Net-7 News Tada-O Halloween -- "Yum, Yum, Pow!" Reporter: Demetr Galan Submission Date: 2002-11-05 18:48:51.0 Tada-O stock went on a rollercoaster ride today after the company's ill-conceived Halloween publicity campaign snarled traffic and caused near-riots throughout the galaxy. While Tada-O officials initially were stunned at the panic caused by their stunt, they later recanted after apparently realizing that name-recognition and product awareness had soared. The confusion started when Tada-O marketers spread out near high-traffic areas and began giving away samples of "candy," while at the same time reviving the near-forgotten Earth celebration of Halloween. The new line of Play-O candy, while reportedly utterly devoid of flavor and nutrition, achieved instant cult status. This resulted in a stampede to find Tada-O representatives as frantic traders tried to horde the new collector's items. Lending to the confusion was the fact that Tada-O robots, disguised as giant Jack-O-Lanterns, also began distributing samples of the new Play-O "Punkin Chunkers." Apparently harmless, the devices throw ripe gourds at unsuspecting victims. Tada-O spokesmen have angrily denied allegations that pumpkins hurtling out of high-velocity cannons might pose a safety hazard. Though they expected "increased visibility and market traction" from the stunt, Tada-O officials, however, were not prepared for the massive pumpkin riots that erupted outside starbases throughout the galaxy. So much pumpkin debris was seen circling the Net-7 station near Saturn that news broadcasts were interrupted by the orbiting cloud of orange vegetable matter. One Net-7 technician commented, "It's going to take us weeks to clean all the pumpkin chunks out of the satellite dishes and transmitters. Tada-O can probably expect to receive a huge cleaning bill, I'll tell you that." A Tada-O spokesman commented: "We regret confusion which are brought by the effort of our publications and because of traffic and cleaning problem. But how there are we who spread glance! Present profit do the Punkin Chunker! And candy! Wow of Yum Yum!" In more somber news, one innocent bystander at Somerled Station was inadvertently killed while inspecting a piece of Sparkle Sugar Ups. A piece of the candy accidentally got in the victim's mouth and he died.